There are so many things I wish I could tell my younger self, although I'm not sure she would listen
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She'd gone dark (one of the people I'm coaching along the path to better nutrition) .. un-responsive to my attempts at reaching out
Dang it all, don't quit. Whatever you do, please don't quit
To a fellow hider, this all-too-familiar feeling easy to recognize. Shame for falling off the wagon, caving into the craving, not handling the emotion of the moment without of vice. Allowing myself to listen to the voice in my head that reminds me I wasn't perfect.
The thing about it is, life doesn't come with “I've arrived” moments.
She looks to me as having a lock on this journey. I don't. Many of the words I say to others are gentle reminders I've spoken to the woman in the mirror when I've been sad, bored, lonely, stressed, happy, and have eaten one too many cookies.
So into the unresponsive black hole of cyberspace, I offered a few words. Though they went her way, this time they were as much for me. My eating far from on-track the past couple of weeks
“This isn't about perfection. It's just not. If you've had a good day, let us celebrate with you. If you're not, say, because it's ok. Please don't hide. If you fall off, learn from it. Figure out what your trigger is so next time you can catch yourself.
What you're embarking on isn't a diet, although the weight will come. Instead, it's learning the life skill of how to care for yourself. And my Dear, developing THAT skill will take more grace than any other
I left her with homework, to start a list of things to celebrate along this journey. To write them in a notebook she can carry with her. Gentle reminders for when she's feeling down. I hope she takes me up on it.
There are a few new lines written in mine as well.
A few weeks ago, my husband headed off for a road trip. I baked doughnuts, and they should have become a gift to the four kids next door, but didn't
I put them in the freezer. It worked, sort of
The Baked Doughnuts for Everyone Cookbook found a home on our bookshelf around the time I started the Venice 8-week run, searching for sweet options that were gluten and dairy-free. I've been pleasantly surprised. Each we've tried has a texture that's soft and tender, similar to that of a cake-doughnut. The ingredients, especially the author's flour choices, are easy to source. The flavor combinations are interesting. I was surprised to find savory options, as well.
These, I have to say, have become my favorite
ps: Sweet rice flour isn't the same as rice flour
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~ Printed with permission from The Baked Doughnuts for Everyone Cookbook
Triple Chocolate Doughnuts (Gluten-free)
- ½ cup oat flour
- ½ cup sweet rice flour
- 2 Tbsp coconut flour
- 3 Tbsp coconut oil, melted, but not hot (or sunflower oil)
- ½ cup natural sugar (Sugar in the Raw or Turbinado)
- 2 eggs (large or XL)
- 3 Tbsp applesauce
- ½ cup + 3 Tbsp almond milk
- ¼ cup cocoa powder
- 2 tsp vanilla
- ½ cup semi-sweet chocolate chips
- ½ tsp kosher salt
- 1 tsp baking powder
- Cocoa Buttercream Frosting
- 1 ½ Tbsp coconut oil melted, but not hot
- ⅓ cup powdered sugar
- 2 Tbsp cocoa powder unsweetened
- 1 ½ Tbsp almond milk
- Preheat the oven to 350° F
- In a medium-sized bowl whisk the oat flour, sweet rice flour, coconut flour, natural sugar, cocoa powder, salt, and baking powder.
- In a small bowl, whisk the eggs, milk, vanilla, oil, and applesauce.
- Stir wet into dry, until combined, being careful to not over-stir (the batter will look lumpy)
- Gently fold in the chocolate shavings.
- Fill each doughnut circle in the pan to about ⅛" from the top. Gently smooth to even out the batter.
- Bake for 20-24 min (Depending on the size of the doughnut pan you're using. Start checking around the 20-minute mark)
- Test with a toothpick for doneness. You want a slightly moist toothpick.
- Let them cool in the pan for about 5 mins before turning them over onto a cooling rack.
- Frost with Cocoa Buttercream Frosting when they have cooled. (or eat them plain)
- Cocoa Buttercream Frosting
- In a bowl, combine all ingredients and blend until smooth. If the frosting is too thick, add a teaspoon of milk at a time. If the batter is too thin, add more powdered sugar.