From midnight walks under the stars .. to the single tulip growing in the compose bin .. second day pot roast .. and pets that touch our hearts in places we didn't know we had. A few things that have been happening in our world ..
Feeling – Sad .. lost .. lonely .. and yet so very grateful. After losing Z just a few short days ago .. we're letting ourselves simply live through the grief. Nothing seems normal without his sniffles and snuffles. I've lost my sweet shadow .. and friend
Smiling and Laughing – as people share favorite stories and photos of him
Holding on – tight. I know that living in an attempt to avoid loss isn't really living. Living in an attempt to circumvent fear isn't living. Living in an attempt to sidestep death isn't living
And yet .. I still find myself tightening everyone's life jackets. Calling to wonder about my children and their families .. adjusting my bike helmet again and again and again .. holding onto Harry and Sally's leashes with everything I have
Loving – my husband. When we need him .. he's always there with a floppy ear scratch or a forehead kiss. We're the luckiest
Surprised – by one of the most beautiful and thoughtful gifts I've ever received. The Pet Resort commissioned a local artist to have a sketch of Wally made. We all fought back a tear the day they gave it to me.
He watches over us from our living room's mantel
Knowing – Life doesn't fit into a square. It's too big .. too unwieldy .. too achingly, maddeningly, beautiful
Sometimes (if we're lucky) we're able to catch the good in four corners or less. When friends bring bread .. and drop a note inside the front door .. and deliver Tupperware brimming with chili. When it's all over and sleep finally finds me .. these small squares make for the simplest .. tiniest symmetrical reminders
Thankful – for friends who show up with gelato + wine + big bear hugs
Cooking – from my latest cookbook .. Tartine All Day. Stay tuned .. there are some really great recipes I'm excited to share
Looking forward to – water walking. I bought my pool pass this week. Hurry up June(!)
Inspired – by Z and his incredible love for life. He brought joy to everyone he met .. was always happy .. and never knew a bad day
The reality is .. we all hold within ourselves the power to transform. In ways big and small .. a room .. a year .. a life. We have the power to make them hot or cold. We can make our homes into caves or havens .. we can make our days stretch or snap
It is ours to decide .. and we must decide
The other day .. we all woke up in mopey moods. The sky was grey and the forecast promised even more clouds ahead. I puttered around per usual .. frying eggs .. vacuuming .. tidying up. My responses were abbreviated and lifeless. My husband carried a furrowed brow .. the puppies grew restless
Thankfully I caught myself .. and practiced a few deep breaths instead. Spritzing rosewater on my face .. I willed myself to snap out of it.
“Set the tone. Rise above. You’re the grown-up. Make it warm. Inject some joy. Please .. let's make him proud”